Wednesday, February 20, 2008

That's Snow Honeycomb

I took this picture awhile ago when we got snow. I thought it made the coolest pattern on our back patio - it's never done that before. Unfortunately Jazz walked through it on her way out to pee, but her paw prints just add to the artwork I guess.

"I still wish on them stars above..."

I so wish I had a camera that could've captured the lunar eclipse tonight. It was AWESOME and for once our sky was totally clear. Truly an amazing night to look out from our respective places on Our Rock.

Edit to add: Click here for a fantastic picture of the eclipse from Astronomy Picture of the Day. I knew they wouldn't let me down!

Figuring there is some powerful energy going on tonight, I sat and wrote down my intentions for the next year next to my thank yous. As my mother always said: Decide, Define, Do.

Of course, you have to be careful what you wish for. When I moved into this new job as graphic designer last November they told me I should have an office with a door, but that there weren't enough in our area so I would have to wait until we moved. (They're shuffling everyone in our building right now because they closed branch offices and are moving people into headquarters.)

No problem. I waited. I thought about it. I was excited. I decided I was going to manifest it a little sooner (especially since it's rather loud where I sit now and sometimes hard to think).

We were recently shown the floor plan for the new area we're moving to and I found out I still don't get an office with a door. Not sure why, but whatever. I was disappointed, but only because I've never had an office with a door and I guess somewhere in the recesses of my mind I still attach some self worth to that even though I know better.

So I went upstairs yesterday to say hi to some of the people I used to work with as a project manager. The Powers That Be had reconfigured the row where my former cubicle was (and only that row - nothing else). Guess what? My old office now has a door. What else can I do but laugh? It was a good Cosmic Joke. :D

Monday, February 18, 2008

Expanding My Brane Again

I'm proofing a chapter on particle physics in a new textbook. The author is talking about the Large Hadron Collider at CERN and as usual, I look up one fact on the net to verify it and several clicks later I'm reading about supersymmetrical particles and the hierarchy problem of the Higgs boson mass. (Not to mention it's suddenly hours later and I still only have four pages proofed where I should have twenty. The Trayce Theory states that reading about physics bends time, if not space, and not in a good way.)

So the way I understand the whole supersymmetry (abbreviated SUSY) thing is that there are two states for particles: spin up and spin down. If they can prove SUSY, they will be proving particles actually have four states: spin up, spin down, and 1/2 of each, or 1/2 spin up and 1/2 spin down.

The hierarchy problem of the Higgs boson mass is a question of why the weak force is 10^32 times stronger than gravity. In other words, we think of gravity as a very strong force since it keeps us humans (among other things) from flying off our big blue marble as we whirl around the Sun at about 1000 MPH, and indeed it keeps our whole planet from being ejected out of our galaxy as we do our celestial do-se-do here in the Milky Way. You'd think a force like gravity must be really strong, right?

Then consider a regular paperclip and a refrigerator magnet. If you put the paperclip on the table (or the floor, or outside on the ground directly) and hold the magnet above it, what happens? The paperclip defies gravity and shoots up to cling to the magnet. So how does a simple frig magnet (the weak force) overcome a force like gravity, so "strong" it keeps us all grounded and maintains the orbit of our planet?

I can't do the math, but I get why this is a helluva question.

As a very stripped down (and perhaps completely wrong) explanation: According to modern physics, the interaction of all matter in our universe can be explained by the math that describes four forces: gravity, electromagnetism, the weak force (Electroweak theory), and the strong force (Quantum chromodynamics). It seems that when you apply the math to everything except gravity, it works out okay and they reach conclusions that match up in any of those forces. However, when you apply the same math to gravity, things get screwed up.

An equation called Fermi's constant explains the weak force (that which causes the magnet to attract the paperclip). An equation called Newton's constant explains gravity, as we've been taught since grade school. Theoretically, you should be able to plug in appropriate numbers (measurements) for your paperclip experiment to each of these equations and come up with a logical conclusion of why a magnet can defy gravity, but the numbers don't work the way we expect, hence our problem.

The Standard Model is a quantum field theory where all the numbers balance out for quantum mechanics (electromagnetism) and special relativity (the strong and the weak forces). However, plug those same numbers into the Newtonian equations for gravity (general relativity), and the answers are all messed up. So instead of saying our Standard Model must be wrong, they've kept looking for "the missing link" that unifies all four forces.

Enter the Higgs boson. If we prove this little baby exists, it would also prove that particles have four states and not just two (as I understand it), which would balance the math properly in the Standard Model for all four known fundamental interactions of particles. Mmmm. Can you smell the Nobel Prize?

I've read that some say it's pointless to try to unify the four forces because three of the forces work on the charge that passes between particles (or massless particles like photons), and gravity works on particles with physical mass, so it's like comparing apples to oranges (unless you can prove the Higgs boson exists, which would allow the math to assign mass to currently massless particles).

Personally, it reminded me of comparing what affects your soul (something non-physical or massless) to what affects your body (which has physical mass).

The theory of supersymmetry lays out the math necessary to make everything work out right, but so far we've been unable to prove supersymmetry in real life experiments because we do not have an instrument capable of creating the level of energy required to detect an actual Higgs boson. That is what they're hoping the Large Hadron Collider at CERN is going to do (bringing me back to what I was originally looking up on the net). According to the CERN web site, they fire that beast up in a few months. Should be interesting if they don't create a black hole that sucks in our galaxy. I hope Stephen Hawking checked that math three times. I'm just sayin...

We're planning to make something appear out of (seemingly) nothing, but really it was there all along (or so we hope). Is this not like MAGIC?

And just to jump down a totally bizarre sci-fi rabbit hole, suppose they define what gives massless light particles mass (however small) - what if that definition also describes how humans come into physical form here on Earth from souls (or alien beings) floating around in some other dimension? Remember that movie K-Pax where Kevin Spacey is a mental patient who claims he traveled in on a beam of light? What if that really happens? What if God turns out to be gravity that pulls light particles into a concentrated physical mass through interference patterns created by genes expressing chromosomes? (I mean why are they fucking around with genetic engineering anyway? Just be who you are for pete's sake.)

Even worse - what if our government already knows this is how humans happen and is looking for that boson so they can figure out how to build a machine that pulls souls into cloned bodies to make them functional (like putting an engine in a car)? Would that be bad or good? Just like bad teleporting turned that dude into the Fly, what if erroneous soul-porting made evil people?

Don't laugh. How many people thought Newton's ideas were nuts (not apples, haha), or that Galileo was off his rocker, or even that Einstein was a bit whacked? Many string theory physicists thought Dr. Michael Duff from Michigan was nuts talking about 11 dimensions instead of 10, then guess what? Hey! They found out 11 dimensions advanced string theory into M theory (aka brane theory)! "Oh, gee, sorry we thought you were talking out your ass Prof. Duff, you were right all along."

It's never the well-behaved people (or particles) that make the history books, trust me.

I had another weird idea while reading all this stuff too. You know how you can draw a line on a piece of paper with a point at either end, and it's just a line, but if you add two more points to the right and above the first two, then connect all the dots, you may just see a flat diamond, but if you shift your perception, you see the illusion of a square that is 3-D. Okay, now think about the fact that you have two eyes, but you only see one image at any given time. If you cover one eye or the other, the image moves in the same way those dots move from 2-D to 3-D - separate them and they are individual images (or lines), but connect the dots and they move into another dimension.

Now consider if they unify the three electromagnetic forces with gravity, would it be like connecting the dots so we end up seeing another dimension? Or perhaps the reason we can't see what we're looking for is because we have one eye covered (perhaps our third eye? Haha).

Science. ::snort:: It's like that damn TV show, Lost. The more answers you find, the more questions you create.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Valentine's Day (Technically)

2.1.08

Books are always one of those sneaky wake up calls for me. They look all unassuming sitting on the shelf, then you open them up and BAM it's like God wrote you a really long letter and stuck the finished, bound product in your hand since you weren't really listening to all those subtle voice mails he left on your Univer-soul answering machine.

Up until today I hadn't read the famous book The Prophet by Khalil Gibran. I'd heard the author's name, but thought maybe he was a basketball player for the Lakers? How did I manage to miss this in all my spiritual reading? I'll have to chalk it up to "when the student is ready, the teacher will appear." I really liked the chapters on love and relationships. Lots of good verses that make you think in there.

Another book I recently started reading is Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert. I first saw it while cruising through our intranet at work (as if cruising Barnes & Noble doesn't cost me enough, but at work I can get Penguin books for half price). I had it on my list, but many other necessities came before it. I saw it again a couple times at B&N, but I didn't want to pay full price for it so I waited. Mark bought it for me while I was in Texas, so that rocked. It's a good read too. Very parallel to some things in my life right now (minus the mental breakdown), and full of stories of her travel (which I intend to have in my future!).

2.14.08

We were in LA/Hollywood last week for a trade show, but stayed a few days extra for vacation as well. What a blast! Kinda took the sting out of some not so warm and fuzzy stuff that happened just before we left.

We saw the Walk of Fame, Chinese Theater, Universal Studios (tour, movie, and CityWalk), Pig & Whistle, LA Ink, Hollywood & Highland mall, took the requisite touristy pics of the Hollywood sign (I would've loved to hike up there if you're allowed, but didn't get around to it), saw Bushwalla live (and in concert) at The Mint, Santa Monica pier (a little lame except for the sunset pictures), local color at Venice Beach (fucking rocked), Rodeo Drive,

drove all the way to the top of the hill up Pacific Drive in Glendale, got a little nervous while driving through Almost East LA (we didn't know), Science Center (the only totally lame thing we ran across, but Mark says we're just spoiled by the museums in NYC)... we did it all.

Well, not all. We did not take any "celebrity home tours," nor did we make it to Warner Bros studio tour (which I hear is better than Universal); we didn't get to go to any vintage shops (there were so many too!), and we never made it up to the Griffith Park Observatory. It's all good though - gives me a reason to go back. I can't believe how much we packed in as it was. Mark even got to visit with a friend he knew when he lived in CA just after high school.

We stayed at the Celebrity Hotel on Orchid, which was charmingly vintage in a glamorous 50s kind of way. I love that it had a kitchenette. I immediately sought out the nearest Whole Foods (there were two! And a Trader Joe's! Score!) and ended up buying more than we could eat during our stay. I hope the front desk guy really did offer the rest to someone who would use it. I hate wasting food. There was a Starbucks in walking distance too.

We both agreed we could totally see some famous movie star overdosing in the bathroom of this place, and the cops busting in to find them lying on the floor in a coma. (Something about black and white checkered bathroom floors with bright yellow walls makes me think that... go figure.)

We had a really good time. Mark was disappointed with the amazing smog that was hanging over LA though. It made photos a challenge sometimes, and I didn't like thinking about breathing it (how does anyone living there escape lung cancer?!), but I've heard the stories, so I guess I kind of expected it. I didn't want to think too hard about what that meant to the environment because I really wanted (and needed) to be happy on this trip. I saved all our plastics in a bag hoping the maids would recycle them. It doesn't make up for much, but I didn't want to contribute to the ickiness either.

We took a red eye back on Sunday night, arriving at JFK at 5am Monday morning. (Yes, we are apparently INSANE.) It was weird watching the sun set over LA, hopping a plane, then watching it rise over NYC only a few hours later. (Shortest. Night. Ever.) After manipulating baggage and driving home through Manhattan's OverAchiever Rush Hour (6:30-7:30 am) I was just getting home at the time I should've jumped in the shower to go to work. And here I had the misconception that somewhere in there I was going to get a couple hours of sleep. HA. I called and told them I'd be late and they were very cool about it.

We're going to San Diego in the Spring. Mark wants to see what a west coast city is like sans smog, and of course that's really where I intend to live eventually. We're even going to check out apartments and such while we're there.

So today is Valentine's Day (well, in California it still is) and we went to see the movie Definitely Maybe with Ryan Reynolds as our date. It was really cute. It's a chick flick, but I love those. (My Cinderella complex totally eats that shit up.) Even though I can barely look at Reynolds without seeing Van Wilder, he did a good job of playing Average Guy Without A Clue That Finally Comes Around, also known as Every Woman's Improbable Wet Dream. Mark says I'm like the character April, the cool chick with red hair that drinks tea and doesn't like politics and reads lots of books. Those characters are usually the ones I like best in movies like that. I guess minus the international travel, that is very like me. (Although in the movies these chicks always work in awesome coffee shops and bookstores - I'd like to know how they pay rent in NYC working minimum wage jobs?! I don't think you could live in a closet in NYC for minimum wage! Or maybe they just don't eat - like ever. That would explain the skinny ones.) I hope someday I can get my finances back in order and remove the "minus" before that travel thing. I think I'd go to London first, then Scotland, and I'd have to hit Ireland since I'm already on the island. India, Morocco, and Greece are also on my list. Maybe Rome, and I'd like to see Venice but I hear it really smells. (Which makes me think "Listen! Do you smell something?") Tuscan countryside definitely, and the south of France would be cool. And Hawaii... I'd love to experience that. (Nothing romantic about any of those places, right? What can I say. Maybe I should just run away to Hollywood and be an actress so I can play all those parts and get it over with.)

Speaking of old 80s movies, we saw a preview for a new Indiana Jones and awesomely, Harrison Ford is still going to play the part. How fucking cool is that? I am so stoked. IMDB says it comes out in October. Katy's really into the two National Treasure movies lately and I keep saying "We need to watch Indiana Jones - they were even better." We borrowed the DVDs from a friend, but haven't got to it yet. I hope they're timeless films that are still as funny as they were back then. I haven't seen them in forever. It's disappointing when you go back and watch a film you remember as being so funny and awesome, but the jokes are stale because you don't remember the references that were part of the pop culture then.

Damn, 2:30am. It's no wonder I'm always tired until the weekend comes around. There's just so much to DO though (fun or not). Funny how time is all we have, yet there never seems to be enough of it. I have another Giancoli chapter to proof too; this one's on particle physics. My favorite. I can already feel my brain starting to hurt from the expansion. Ha. :)

Pictures of California coming as soon as I have time to download them from the camera. I took lots of video too, but I haven't even made time to compile the video from Texas in November yet. :sigh: More time! I need more hours!

Monday, January 21, 2008

My Brain is Bubbling Over

Does anyone else find it odd how often apples pop up in the arts and sciences? I mean, why not oranges or kiwis or bananas? Why are we not "as American as cherry pie" since the story of George Washington's cherry tree would be a more logical association in our country?

The question came to mind because I'm watching a show from the Science channel talking about wormholes, and the guy says the term came from using the analogy of a worm burrowing through an apple to reach the other side.

Other famous apple shenanigans:

1. Newton's experience with Earth-bound fruit, contributing to his theories of gravity and motion (and he was NOT hit on the head - he only observed the apple falling and wondered why it always went straight down instead of any other direction).
2. "An apple a day keeps the doctor away." This idea probably goes back all the way to Hippocrates and other Greek physicians living in Rome that declared the fruit good for digestion and constitution, but the actual phrase was more recently made famous in 1904 by J.T. Stinson in an address to the St. Louis Exposition.
3. Adam and Eve's downfall after eating an apple in the Garden of Eden. (Which is also not true - there is no mention on an apple in the book of Genesis, only "the fruit of the tree." I'm thinking the assumption it was an apple probably came from the painting The Fall of Man in 1470 by Hugo Van Der Goes, in which the Tree of Knowledge is depicted as an apple tree, but Cecil Adams from The Straight Dope has some interesting ideas about it too in his article here.)
4. In Greek mythology we have Eris and the Apple of Discord, the golden apple tree that was Zeus & Hera's wedding gift from Gaia (Mother Earth), and the golden apples that Venus gave to Milanion to drop in Atlanta's path so she would lose the race and he would win her hand in marriage.
5. I'd suggest that the tradition of "an apple for teacher" may have come from the incorrect Biblical association of apples with knowledge, but since that story includes negative connotations as well, and I can't find anything else on the net, I'll go with the other theory that fruit was not always easy to get "back in the day" so a poorly-paid teacher may not have been able to afford such luxuries, causing an apple to be a greater gift than we would consider it in modern times.
5. Legendary apple fables and stories: William Tell, Johnny Appleseed, and Snow White.
6. And seriously, how much of a coincidence is it really that the most rad computer company ever is named Apple? I'm just sayin.

What makes apples such Fruity Royalty? And why does everyone assume the apples in all those examples above (save the last one) were red? Well, I guess cuz red ones are sweet and green ones are tart, but y'know, being a little tart once in awhile gives you a better chance at being in the history books. :D

~*~

I was looking through the Astronomy Pictures of the Day for pics to add to my Cosmos screen saver, and I found this:

http://apod.nasa.gov/apod/ap071216.html

At first glance it only looks like a mangle of colors, but if you unfocus your eyes you'll see a 3D image of a teapot. Too fuckin cool. If you can't see it, pick one of the darker turquoise blotches to the right or left of center, about midway down the picture, and just stare at that one spot without blinking; eventually you should start to see the teapot take shape out of the corner of your eye. It will look like it's floating in the foreground. It's a matter of perception, like seeing a 3D cube drawn on a 2D piece of paper. Of course, thinking about perception sent me off on all kinds of physics tangents.

When I was a kid, I used to color in these geometric books called Altair Designs. I think I've mentioned them in a previous blog but I'm too lazy to go find where. My friend Christina and I would color in all the shapes (with artist's markers - the precise lines don't work well with crayons), then look at it out of focus (as described above) and see different patterns in the geometry (not something as tangible as the teapot of course). It was like we'd done two pictures instead of one at the same time. We called it "blurring our eyes." (Gimme a break, I was like, 8.)

It freaks me out thinking this is related to holographic principles, because who the fuck finds this kind of information on their own at that age (and remembers it clearly in their adult years)? Then again, what kid chooses geometric coloring books and fancy pens over the standard cartoon character/Crayola scenario? (I always found regular coloring books infinitely boring as a kid.) Not that I realized looking at a picture with blurry focus had anything to do with theoretical physics until now.

But still.

Weirdness.

I've spent most of my adult years trying to feel "normal" because kids always thought I was weird and they couldn't relate to the things I wanted to play. Maybe they were right. I'm just strange.

Thinking about perception and the holographic principle represented by that picture reminded me of my previous theory (described in the last couple paragraphs of this entry) about how maybe we create the Universe with our thoughts, holding it separate from the Whole by using imagination and water. If you can see either a flat bunch of colorful shapes, or a 3D floating teapot in the same picture, depending on your perception, why couldn't our entire existence be the same way? (No, I have not read The Holographic Universe yet, but it's on my list. I'm sure it has similar ideas.)

In my speculation of our reality being created through a star, I was picturing something like a soap bubble on a stick (cuz everything's better on a stick! sorry - ren faire joke), where our experiences all take place inside the bubble, the star is the circle part of the wand, and creation comes from imagination, or original intent/thought, represented by breath on the other side of the circle (i.e., air being blown through the circle to create the bubble).

Credit: istockphoto.com

I was reading the Wikipedia definition of "holographic principles" and it says:

"...a speculative conjecture about quantum gravity theories... claiming that all of the information contained in a volume of space can be represented by a theory which lives in the boundary of that region. In other words, if you have a room, you can model all of the events within that room by creating a theory which only takes into account what happens in the walls of the room."

Gives the phrase "if walls could talk" a whole nother dimension. haha

So comparing that definition to my bubble picture, it seems to be saying much the same thing. In order to describe our entire universe, all we need is the information (intent/thought) that creates the film separating the air inside the bubble from the air outside the bubble, but what if the information only creates an illusion of separation? Yes, I know, been there, done that, what rock have I been living under? The illusion itself is not my point - I want to know how we find ourselves in the middle of this illusion and can we change our perception so we can see what we've created from outside the illusion. Is that what happens at death? We get to see the bubble from outside?

Credit: nanopedia.case.edu

Does the following picture represent what we're currently seeing from inside the bubble?

Credit: funsci.com

Perhaps multiple dimensions then look like this:

Credit: Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory

Ironically, in looking for that picture I found a whole article on this very theory, using the same analogy, and one of the first scientists quoted was Michio Kaku at City College in New York, one of the very same scientists in the show I was watching earlier that started this whole train of thought.

Coincidence? Get real.

Friday, January 18, 2008

Get the Funk Out

I am Bummed (yes, with a capital B). Maybe it's the weather that stays grey all day but refuses to snow (or when it does snow, it's big wet nasty flakes that just make the roads dangerous). Maybe it's because I'm tired of being cold. Maybe it's being sick with bronchitis for going on two weeks now. Maybe it's because I "did the responsible thing" and didn't go to the Mraz concert in Vermont a couple days ago (responsibility is the sucky part of being an adult) or the fact that my credit is royally screwed from bad past decisions and I can't fix it overnight. Maybe it's the fact that I can't even fucking think in this house because there is constant noise and commotion and people coming through the door and the dog freaking out, or maybe I'm just tired and cranky. It's stupid that I feel this way because good things have been happening, but I can't seem to shake this funk no matter how many times I go over the list of things I'm grateful for. I'm just not feelin it. Is that bad or just human?

Here's some of the good things:

I got my "Irony" tshirt from Blend yesterday. Jon is so good to me. These things aren't even for sale on the web site yet, but he sent me one in advance because he's cool like that.

IT finally received my new MacBook Pro at work so I traded in the Dell I've been working on and thankfully kicked Windows to the curb once again. It's awesome that I've worked in so many Apple-user offices. In fact, I think the porn company was the only non-Mac corporate outfit I've worked for (if you can call them corporate). Oops, no, the lawyers used DOS-based machines. (Yikes! How old is DOS?) Whatever the ratio is of Mac offices to Windows offices, I'm sure I've beat the statistic for someone who isn't involved with Information Technology.

Steve Jobs' keynote address at MacWorld was awesome. The new toys are all really cool. As soon as I make my first bazillion dollars I'm buying them all. I fantasize about working at HQ in Cupertino (especially since I've seen it now). Yes, I could be the poster child for Macaholics Anonymous. It's the grace in design that brings out the love. Sure, there are other products that do some things better or offer features the Mac doesn't, but do they look that awesome doing it?

I've got some travel coming up - Marie's baby shower is next week in Texas, and Mark and I are going to LA in early February. Yay.

Found new Mraz videos on YouTube tonight. Apparently he played a closed show in NYC last night. Just kill me now. I don't get to see him in Vermont, then he's right next door and I don't even know it. Well, actually I had a really weird unexplainable vibe the other day at work and I had the thought that he might be in the area, but I blew it off as logical speculation - I mean duh, he lived in NYC so he must have friends here to visit. :sigh: One of these days I'm going to start believing my intuitions and then we'll all be in trouble. The videos really shouldn't be posted because they're songs from the new cd. I wrote to the dude to let him know, but that's all I can do to help. I was sure happy to hear them though. Made my night. And hey, I don't feel quite so funky anymore.