Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Victorias Secret FAIL

A few months ago I went on a mission to replace some seriously aging bras. I must've spent at least $200 on enough plain, daily-wear, no-lace-involved unmentionables to last a little more than a week without having to do laundry.

Victoria's Secret has been a good brand in the past. I have some items that have been in service for over five years. Altho I rarely buy anything that's not on sale there, it is generally expensive enough - even with a discount - to make one expect a higher quality than something you would get at say... Walmart. If the adage "you get what you pay for" is true, then I purchased lingerie that should last AT LEAST a year or two, hopefully much more since I am not particularly hard on my clothes.

Here's the big but(t) in this story...

These only-a-couple-months-old bras are actually made with an element of evil. I'm convinced somewhere along the factory line, my unassuming underwear were sent into a dark cavernous space, where they were shown a film instructing them how to unravel and tangle, stretch and deteriorate, and generally collaborate with the machine to wreak havoc on the psyche of the owner. Much like certain members of the GOP.

Every one of my "new" garments have had the underwires at least poke through the lining, if not entirely remove themselves from their sewn compartments during cleaning. In addition, the straps wrap themselves around each other in such a decadent fabric grind they could make the Playboy channel blush. They emerge from the washer wound up so tight even a sailor would be left scratching his head over the knots. Of course this watery dance stretches said straps to their limits, effectively making me shorten them more each time I wear them lest they fall all over my shoulders in their exhaustion. Further, ANY other type of material that may be in the gentle cycle with them causes the fabric to pill and the elastic to unravel at the edges, making them look more like Goodwill material than anything from an "upscale" establishment.

This is not a matter of overuse and too-frequent cleaning due to lack of volume. I'll bet I could actually go three weeks without doing laundry and still be wearing fresh booby gear every day, altho in that case they would not always match my outfit, which is one of my charming idiosyncrasies. My point is, these newcomers are not the only bras I have, nor are they the only ones I wear, so on average I'd say each one gets to surf the suds maybe once every two weeks. They enjoy a very posh life for lingerie - I'll bet the JC Penney bras would kill to be in their drawers.

If you Google "Victoria's Secret complaints" you will find I am not the only unsatisfied customer with these issues. The company's response has been that every bra's tag says "Hand Wash Only" and women do not heed this warning, so the company is resolving themselves of all responsibility. Please. This is the biggest political cop out I've ever heard. First of all, I've been buying VS products for years and never have I hand-washed any of them. The ones I have from five years ago still look new. The new ones look five years old already. Only in the last six months have I had an issue with them falling apart and tangling up, which tells me they probably changed their manufacturer to an under-18 sweatshop in a third world country. Secondly, we do not live in 1950. What modern woman with access to a washing machine actually chooses to dunk her drawers in the sink? If you are doing this, you have too much time on your hands and I will gladly provide you with a kitchen to clean right after you bake me an apple pie. You think those pouty peddling Brazilian brats have dishpan hands from cleaning the lacy scraps of cloth they model? Give me a freakin' break.

I've considered gathering up the offensive garments and taking them back from whence they came; my receipt is dated June 9. I haven't decided yet whether it's worth dealing with a snooty, black-clad 20-something trailing Dream Angels vapor that thinks she has authority along with that key to the register.

Caveat Emptor I suppose. Vicky's new secret is that she ain't what she used to be.


In other news... it occurred to me that when you are little they tell you if you are lost to stop running around and stay in one place until someone finds you. That does not work the same way with a job hunt.


Candz said...

I agree! I have bras (which no longer fit but are too beautifully made to part with) from - gulp - 1998! They only look slightly worn and I wore them ALL. THE. TIME. I stopped buying bras at VS when they discontinued the style. Apparently their buyers haven't caught on that not everyone wants stretchy straps allowing their boobs to bounce all over the place like lottery ping pong balls over a hot air stream! (Or maybe VS doesn't want women with DDs shopping there)

Anyway, I used to think Frederick's was trashy and most of their stuff was scratchy but things have changed. Now I love Frederick's bras and have no complaints regarding quality or longevity.

Be sure to follow up and let us know how the return process goes at VS? Give em hell and good luck!

draagonfly said...

Thanks for the tip about Frederick's! I too thought they were the "trashier" store and lower quality, but if they've stepped things up, perhaps they'll win my heart (and my money). :)

CSD Faux Finishing said...

Take them back. No joke, especially if you have a reciept and can get your money back and not just a store credit. I worked there for 3 years and it is the policy of the company to take back any thing, at any time no matter how old and dated it looks. If the 20-something tries to tell you that you can't get your money back ask for the manager. She will refund you, no doubt. How truly sad. I have some bras from when I worked there ('97 believe it or not!) that are still in fine shape and they go in the washer on gentle. I also suggest in investing in a garment bag, one of those mesh babies because your tangled mess should not be. And it is gentler than handwashing believe it or not.

I had a similar thing happen with a tee recently. Will be blogging on GLR about that, needless to say I was displeased with our favorite musician's choice of manufacturer.